10 Things not to do at dinner on your Valentine's Day date
1) Recite your dating history. Improvise. Include pets.
2) Stand up every five minutes, circle your table with your arms outstretched, and make aeroplane sounds.
3) Pull out a harmonica and play blues songs when your date begins talking about themselves.
4) When ordering, inquire whether the restaurant has any live food.
5) Ask your date how much money they have with them.
6) If they are paying, order the most expensive thing on the menu. Take one bite. Yawn.
7) Slide under the table. Take your plate with you.
8) Beg your date to tattoo your name on their derriere. Keep bringing the subject up.
9) Insist that the waiter cut your food into little pieces. In a similar vein, insist that he take a bite of everything on the plate, to make sure no one poisoned it.
10) Lick your plate. Offer to lick theirs.
·Angelwink· *Valentines 2002*
